Hate Is a Strong Word

I hate..

how I’m not reading books anymore.

how I stopped writing on my Moleskine once life started happening, which totally sucks because I promised myself in the beginning of the year that it would be the only New Years’ Resolution I’d complete.

how I can’t fucking fix my clothes right after changing 5x a day coz I can’t decide what to wear.

how I haven’t took out and arranged all the contents of my moving box from Jakarta simply coz I’m “too lazy”.

how I’m nearing quarter life crisis.

how I have really poor financial skills. Save save save!

how I can’t really get rid of my BlackBerry because I have so many family members and friends on it.

how I feel like an idiot whenever I switch from my BlackBerry and iPhone.

how snobbish I feel and sound writing those 2 statements above.

how I can’t even cook up a decent blog post despite so many things going on in my mind.

how my (irrational) fears still keep me from doing the things I really want to do. This one hits the most.

But beneath all that, I’m really loving what life has to offer right now. Sometimes I just need to remind myself how blessed I am by writing all the negativity because I know how much I’ve got to be thankful for. My mind works weirdly, you see.

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