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The Sunday Currently, v12

Published by Justine

FEELING
A little bit better, hopefully? It’s Day 9 of post-op recovery from tonsillectomy and while the previous days have been absolutely torture, I can actually see a bit of light at the end of the tunnel. If you follow my twitter then you would have probably seen my tweets of the same kind below. The past week has been crazy. Tonsillectomy recovery in adults is not for the faint-hearted. I am glad I got to have a little bit of outside R&R this weekend because my family decided to book rooms at a beach resort nearby. After being cooped up in my room for a good 5 days crying in pain, I think I needed a different atmosphere.

Other than that, today I found something that had the potential to break me and put me at my lowest. If this were me a month ago, I would have probably flipped and allowed myself to reach rock bottom. Somehow today is a different day and after a good cry to one of my best guy friends, I decided to pull myself up and see things a little bit clearer.

HOPING
That whatever today’s decision was for myself, I will stick with it and let myself follow through. Just a little push day by day and I should be good, yes?

READING

Milan Kundera’s The Unbearable Lightness of Being. I am happy to report that my reading streak each week has not been broken, yay! This book isn’t in my comfort zone so it’s taking me quite a while to finish it. Usually when that happens I tend to stop in the middle and try to move on to another book, but the characters really draw me in, and the journey of how relationships are formed and maintained are so complex, yet so close to the heart at the same time. It would be such a waste to stop reading it.

Also, I found this “quote” on Facebook from a friend’s profile that struck me like thunder, so I’d like to share it here:

“Not all toxic people are cruel and uncaring. Some of them love us dearly. Most of them have good intentions. Most are toxic to our being simply because their needs and way of existing in the world force us to compromise ourselves and our happiness. They aren’t inherently bad people, but they aren’t the right people for us. And as hard as it is, we have to let them go. As much as you care, you can’t destroy yourself for the sake of someone else. You have to make your well-being a priority. Whether that means breaking up with someone, loving a family member from a distance, letting go of a friend, or removing yourself from a situation that feels painful—you have every right to leave and create a safer space for yourself.”

LISTENING
To my thoughts and trying to counter them when I deviate away from what I’m supposed to be thinking about. This should be a good start!

WATCHING

After about more than a year, I am finally opening myself up to Korean watchables again! I suddenly had the urge and selected I Order You (당신을 주문합니다) on Viki out of pure randomness. Honestly, I don’t know what made me choose it considering Yunho is the main lead and has been known to not be the best at acting (I love you bb, and you can sing, dance, AND perform but acting.. hmm) but the FOOD PORN in this series is glorious. The leading man is a chef and the series is centered around a lot of pretty food so I think that’s what made me initially stay. Once you get through the first 2 episodes the storyline starts to get pretty interesting that I’m actually looking forward to continuing it now.

LOVING

The Archie reboot! I can’t wait for Issue #2 and getting the comics in my hands. As a kid I was such a follower of the Archie series (I mean, who wasn’t?) and seeing as how this reboot looks great, with a substantial story to follow makes me really look forward to the rest of the series.

WISHING
THAT I WILL BE FULLY RECOVERED WITHIN THIS WEEK! I cannot wait until I finally conquer this tonsillectomy recovery process! This month has been CRAZY! I wish all the craziness in my heart, mind, throat and body would take a backseat for a while so I can focus on the good in my life, and ultimately stop dwelling on the things that hurt.

What Are My Hidden Talents?

Published by Justine

When The B Bar introduced another link-up for July, it immediately caught my eye and wanted to write about it. I admit I am quite selective with linkups but I will not pass up a chance to write about something that interests me, especially since I’ve been doing so well with blogging lately. I also like that this is another one of those entries that require positive self-introspection and that’s always a good cognitive exercise.

What constitutes a hidden talent, really? Is it the something that you know you can do well but other people don’t know, or something that you have yet to discover but actually possess it (does that even make sense)? In my understanding it has always been the former, so let’s get on with it!

Cooking
I consider myself to be pretty okay at cooking. It’s mostly trial and error, but people who eat the meals I prepare are pretty satisfied by the end of the course. By no means am I a chef in the making, or have any formal education for it but I’m not a stranger in the kitchen and can probably whip up something with whatever’s left on the fridge or pantry. Growing up my mom would always do the Sunday dinner cooking at home back in Jakarta if we’re not eating out and I would watch her and learn or follow everything that she does. This is how I knew the basic ingredients and how to make everything work even with just a little. Thanks, momma!

Fist in Mouth
I am not proud of this “hidden talent” but it makes for a comical story, provided that I don’t actually have to demonstrate it, but oftentimes I have to when it’s brought up. I can fit my whole fist into my mouth. I don’t know if it’s because I have small hands or I just really have a big mouth. Either way, it’s funny.

Tech Stuff
Being a child of the internet, my skills are nowhere compared to my counterparts online. But in the real world, they actually matter, much to my surprise. I do a lot of troubleshooting and fixing different devices for family and friends. I’m usually pretty successful and not charge anything because I feel like it’s something that can actually be done easily with the help of online articles and troubleshooting guides. Although I feel like I should be charging if I end up doing too much, because that would mean utilizing my time, right? I remember my ex-boss giving me 3 broken iPhones and I managed to fix all of them. Huh. I kind of feel bad when I start “charging” though, but I feel even more annoyed when other places charge an arm and a leg for them.

Finding Deals Online
I am probably at level 4 (out of 10) for this one but I consider it a pretty good feat (mostly because my family depends on me for it). There have been quite a few instances where I got really great deals online, whether for plane tickets, hotel stays, the normal shopping spree coupon codes, or even downloads for stuff that can’t be named (if you know what I mean).

Check out these lovely bloggers below to know about their hidden talents too!

Alyssa J Freitas
Annie Reeves
The Not Quite Adult
Equal Parts of a Whole
Life Modifier
soak and simmer
Carrie Loves
Otherworldly
Emilie Lima Burke
Knowing Kelly
Something Good
PreppyPanache
Cassandra Monroe

Ember & March
Rossetto
Feathers and Stripes
Leigh Clair
Southern Soul
All The Pretty Stars
Perfect Enough For Us
Mrs. on the Move
The Toppy Top
Mint Julep Girl
A Minimalist Blog
Beauty and the Pitch
Meg Biram

Around the Web #1

Published by Justine

Welcome! I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time now because I read so much shit online that I might as well share it here. It’s a list of links that I come across, read, learn from, and bookmark from around the web. It’s something that I’ll try to do as often as long as I remember to bookmark the links that I’ve read or liked.

Here goes..

I have been obsessed with Ellen Pao (and her husband, Buddy Fletcher) articles the whole weekend. I don’t know how many I’ve read but the two above were what struck me the most. Honestly, I don’t know how to feel about the whole situation. My main concern is that it’s crazy how she still chose to work at the same company she felt so strongly (and sued) against. With her background and intelligence, she could have worked anywhere.. or even set up her own empire. Everything’s so crazy to the point that it almost doesn’t make sense.

A lot of things (with the exception of religion) that were listed there made a lot of sense to me and I totally related to. Your 20s is such a pivotal time in your life because it’s where you get to learn what life really has to offer.

It’s always very inspiring reading about celebrities and their battle with mental disorders. The stigma nowadays is still so bad (especially for people in the limelight) that I admire the courage it would take for them to talk about their struggle with it.

I feel I’m gonna have to look back on this entry every time I turn a decade older. It lists out the financial matters you’re “supposed” to take into account and separates them every decade. Personally I don’t see myself opening a retirement fund anytime soon but I do have an insurance plan that I don’t plan to touch until I’m old and unemployed. Does that count?

That’s it for this entry! I was supposed to have a few more but I realized I didn’t want to populate the page too much if I were to talk about every link I mentioned. I prefer this way of being able to explain my side for every link I post to make it a bit more personal. After all, this is very much a personal blog.

The Sunday Currently, v11

Published by Justine

FEELING
I am finally discharged from the hospital after being admitted for 3 days and 2 nights. I’m feeling the after effects of hospitalization right now.. my throat hurts day 3 post-op, my jaw kind of hurts, my tongue hurts, and a little bit of my chest hurts when I try to breathe heavily. I’m not allowed to cough, to exert any effort, lay down flat on my back (neck to head needs to be elevated), lift heavy stuff, or talk too loud. That’s the extent of my physical pain right now. All else, still a mix bag of emotions.

READING
South of the Border, West of the Sun by Haruki Murakami. I’ve been on a roll with my reading lately. It seems like I’m reading a new book each time I write a new TSC post. I hoarded books for my recovery reading and I hope I get to finish them in a span of one week.

LISTENING
The only thing I can hear right now is the sound my room A/C. Truth to be told, I haven’t slept in my room for over a month now and I admit it feels a bit weird to be back in my bed again. I temporarily moved to my sister’s room the past month because I needed to “get away” from a previous routine and detach myself from a certain memory. I’m now back in my room because it’s bigger and more conducive to my recovery but I’m still getting a certain feeling that I wish would go away already. I guess I need to accept this and hopefully it will pass.

EATING
Nothing at the moment, but I just finished eating a quarter of a tub of strawberry ice cream that a close friend bought for me when I got home. That’s pretty much my diet for the upcoming days: ice cream and porridge. There are still a lot of restrictions after my tonsillectomy and if I want to get better ASAP then I have to strictly follow doctors orders. I’d rather be eating a burger than ice cream though, but I’ll take what I can get.

HOPING
That my recovery goes well and there will be no post-surgery bleeding. The doctor says this likely happens and I’ve read a lot of instances where it does. Basically during the recovery process there’s a chance that your throat just bleeds randomly and you may have to be rushed to the ER for it. I’m crossing my fingers that this doesn’t happen and that I’ll have a smooth transition from surgery to recovery.

THINKING
As much as I want to dodge this one I feel like I need to confront my thoughts but there are just too many right now. Career decisions, matters of the heart, health issues, money matters, too many! How do I segregate these thoughts properly so that it won’t overpopulate my already overpopulated mind?

LOVING
How the family is complete right now. My dad arrived on the morning of my surgery and I am just so happy we are finally one unit again.

On Nerves and Recovery

Published by Justine

It’s exactly 2:03am and I cannot sleep. A lot of things are happening today. My dad arrives from Jakarta/Singapore in a couple of hours, and I have to check myself into the hospital for my tonsillectomy later today. By 6am, I will have to zip my mouth (as what my doctor says, but really it’s just fasting) to prep for my surgery at noon. I’m just here in bed winging this entry because I’ve been tossing and turning, a ball of confusion, and nerves, and the let’s-just-get-it-over-with mindset. Surgery = tonsillectomy.

If you’ve read my blog long enough you know that I’ve been struggling with tonsillitis on and off. I was hospitalized last April for the very same reason and my health has just been on major ping pong this year because of this crazy throat. Heck, even if you enter the word “tonsil” in my blog search bar there are a lot of entries from over the years that prove that this has been a recurring evil all throughout my existence. I think it makes a lot of sense that I have it removed, right? This isn’t really my first surgery too. I’ve had an appendectomy when I was in 3rd grade so it’s not really about that.

My mom isn’t all for this procedure at all. She has this fear that it may ruin my vocal chords and I won’t be able to sing like I used to anymore. Initially that was also my biggest worry, then I started researching on singers who had their tonsils removed and Kristin Chenoweth is still an exceptional singer, so I’m banking on that. My dad, on the other hand, has had his removed many years ago so he’s definitely encouraging. I guess the reason why it took me THIS long to make a decision was the too many voices left and right and factors to weigh on whether I should be doing it or not.

When I met my new ENT last week, he said my throat looks like it’s been through a lot and directly advised me to have it removed after I told him my lifelong struggle of being my tonsils’ bitch. He’s one of the best ENT’s in this region and it would be stupid to just overlook that and not follow his orders. I am living proof that this illness has been fucking up my health all throughout my life so I used all my adult decision making powers and decided to go with it, without the influence of others.

To be honest, I’m not scared about the procedure or the surgery itself. I am in good hands because this doctor is the best (thus very expensive) and I know it’s probably just a recurring activity for him in the operating room. What I am most worried about is my recovery period. Post-op tonsillectomy is absolutely shit as I’ve read and I am not looking forward to feeling pain everywhere in my throat, my nose, my jaw, or anywhere pain comes out. I know I have to go through hell before I bounce back but that’s where the nerves are! I guess I just have to put my high tolerance with pain to major use and make sure I get through it all. Reading the #tonsillectomy hashtag on Twitter has been helping (or not? like wow people are in PAIN) as I know I’m not on my own.

Either way, I’m FINALLY saying goodbye to my tonsils and I don’t think it’s something that I will miss. It has made me its bitch for a while now and I’m finally getting rid of it. Update you when I’m done and let’s see how the hurt ruins me! Ha-ha.